Black- Eyed Susans by Julia Heaberlin

"I am the star of screaming headlines and campfire ghost stories. I am one of the four Black-Eyed Susans.
The lucky one.

As a sixteen-year-old, Tessa Cartwright was found in a Texas field, barely alive amid a scattering of bones, with only fragments of memory as to how she got there. Ever since, the press has pursued her as the lone surviving “Black-Eyed Susan,” the nickname given to the murder victims because of the yellow carpet of wildflowers that flourished above their shared grave. Tessa’s testimony about those tragic hours put a man on death row.

Now, almost two decades later, Tessa is an artist and single mother. In the desolate cold of February, she is shocked to discover a freshly planted patch of black-eyed susans—a summertime bloom—just outside her bedroom window. Terrified at the implications—that she sent the wrong man to prison and the real killer remains at large—Tessa turns to the lawyers working to exonerate the man awaiting execution. But the flowers alone are not proof enough, and the forensic investigation of the still-unidentified bones is progressing too slowly. An innocent life hangs in the balance. The legal team appeals to Tessa to undergo hypnosis to retrieve lost memories—and to share the drawings she produced as part of an experimental therapy shortly after her rescue.

What they don’t know is that Tessa and the scared, fragile girl she was have built a  fortress of secrets. As the clock ticks toward the execution, Tessa fears for her sanity, but even more for the safety of her teenaged daughter. Is a serial killer still roaming free, taunting Tessa with a trail of clues? She has no choice but to confront old ghosts and lingering nightmares to finally discover what really happened that night." (goodreads)

I want to start this review with the first line from the prologue:

"Thirty- two hours of my life are missing."

When I started this book, I was expecting to get the details of Tessa before she was found in that grave, how she was abducted and what happened to her between being taken and ending up in that grave. Unfortunately the story doesn't involve itself around that period of time, probably because of Tessa's memory loss, but I felt it was something important missing from the story. There is a chapter at the end from the monster, and that is where I wanted to get some of the missing pieces. Sadly though you will have to accept that you will never know what happened to Tessa in those thirty- two hours. Bits and pieces, but not a solid timeline.

I felt this book was a really slow read. There were a few interesting twists but for most of the story it was slow burning. When answers are finally out in the open, I wasn't satisfied. The story took so long to develop, and everything was placed exactly in the correct stops but then the ending was slapped together and ended, quickly. Once Tessa gets the answers about her monster there is only a few page epilogue where the authors tries to wrap up everyone's life in as few words as possible. After such a slow reading book the ending was too rushed.

Jo was a really interesting character who in my opinion, kept the story alive. Her job as a DNA forensic scientist was basically to try to identify the bones of the unknown Susans. It was a unique story in a way that showed the evolution of forensic science. In the 1995 chapters, just after Tessie returns and preps for the trial, it's clear that the forensic science just isn't there yet to fully prove, or disprove, Terrell's involvement. Terrell was tried and convicted on a lot of assumption because of the lack of DNA science, which is where Jo in the present chapters is working to help give answers to lots of unknown questions.

Some of the most surprising twists in the story come from Jo and her findings on the past Susans. We don't know much from them since they have been dead the whole story, which is where Heaberlin could add in some amazing twists. Everything about Jo's involvement was incredibly interesting and everytime she popped up I wondered what bomb she was going to drop next. Another reason I believe Jo was the soul of this book is because Jo gives us answers whereas Tessie/Tessa only gives us more questions. She has no memory and says questionable things that give them impression she knows more than she says. Tessa isn't about to remember instantly no matter how desperately we need her to, so the only answers we are getting throughout this book are from Jo and the Susans bones.

A few chapters into the story I wondered how this could possibly end. Even Tessa believes Terrell, the man she testified against seventeen years ago now on Death Row, is innocent. As the story goes along, his case becomes stronger but is he really innocent or just running his cleverness behind bars? The identity of the Black- Eyed Susans killer to me became obvious with one slick comment, and everything from then on built on that suspection. It's like a tick for me, I cannot just sit back and enjoy a mystery book I consume it and obsess with solving the clues the author so carefully lays out for us. Showing us things we don't deem important until everything ties together. I also came to the conclusion that not all murders get solved, and maybe Tessa's journey will end with her having yo accept she just might never know what happened. Highly unlikely and unsatisfying. Maybe we the audience will end knowing all the answers and want to scream at Tessa through the book who did this to her. There are so many ways this story can go wrong and not many ways it can go right.

My Rating: 3/5 Stars