We Are Okay by Nina Lacour

"You go through life thinking there’s so much you need…

Until you leave with only your phone, your wallet, and a picture of your mother.

Marin hasn’t spoken to anyone from her old life since the day she left everything behind. No one knows the truth about those final weeks. Not even her best friend, Mabel. But even thousands of miles away from the California coast, at college in New York, Marin still feels the pull of the life and tragedy she’s tried to outrun. Now, months later, alone in an emptied dorm for winter break, Marin waits. Mabel is coming to visit, and Marin will be forced to face everything that’s been left unsaid and finally confront the loneliness that has made a home in her heart." (goodreads)

First, I want to discuss the beautiful cover. It's a perfect representation of Marin's dorm room in New York, to the beach in San Francisco that holds so much history. Even in her "new life" she is constantly looking back and cannot let her grief go, it has controlled her. Although it isn't much of a new life at all, she is running. Running from her home, the memories, and herself. Marin is a painful character, who has let sadness overcome her, she has no sense of individuality. Marin is a zombie, she walks around and tries not to remember the past although when Mabel comes to visit, it's all she can think of.

I can see why so many people love this book. Grief is a complicated and hard thing to overcome and accept no matter what age. We Are Okay is told in alternating chapters, Marin in present day New York, with Mabel coming to visit her and flashbacks to the last summer she spent in San Francisco with her grandfather and Mabel.

However, it didn't touch me like I thought it would. I just found it so incredibly boring. Like I had said, Marin kind of lost her sense of self and sort of acts like a zombie. I know its the pressure of her grief and sadness which I understand, it just made for kind of a boring read. There didn't seem to be any big surprises or any climax to the novel. To be completely honest, I didn't finish, I just couldn't push myself to the end. I didn't connect to Marin and wasn't very invested in her story, however sad it was it didn't get to my emotions. I did have a coworker fill me in on what I missed, and it seems to stay the same slightly boring pace up to the point where you find out what happened to her grandfather (which wasn't overly surprising) to the end.

I usually give books I don't finish a DNF rating or a 1 star (on goodreads), but I didn't want to do that for this book. I think there a good story there, I just wasn't connecting like I was suppose to. The praise I have heard for this book is really good and has really helped people understand that kind of emptiness. The emptiness of losing everything you have and still getting up the next morning and getting through the day. Marin has an incredible unknown strength that way. I definitely plan to revisit this book in the future. I am sure there will come a time when I am in Marin's place and can finally accept her character and understand her more.

Maybe it was the wrong book at the wrong time. I really wanted to like it but it is also very different from the books I normally read. I wish I could have connected with Marin more, but I am not in the same place as her or felt she was a very dynamic character.

We Are Okay is a LGBT friendly read. 

My Rating: 2/5 Stars